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The Smoking Doctor is an NHS hospital anaesthetist and he smokes about 30 a day. Blad Tolstoy is a cartoonist and mysterious eastern european author.
Priceless start to this episode of the new Fast Show. The non-smoking Jazz Club!! Says it all!!
Five surgeons are discussing who were the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon says, 'I like to see Accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'
The second responds, 'Yeah, but you should try Electricians! Everything inside them is colour-coded.'
The third surgeon says, 'No, I really think Librarians are the best everything inside them is in alphabetical order.'
The fourth surgeon chimes in, 'You know I like Construction Workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would.'
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine, and there are only two moving parts - the mouth and the arsehole - and they are interchangeable'AMEN to that. Read More...
by Blad Tolstoy
By Blad Tolstoy
Many of you are now aware of the article that appeared in 'Hemel Today' advocating the shooting of smokers by immature hack journalist Alan Dee on 24th July entitled: "Snipers could soon snuff out smoking." Similarly, the same article was printed in the 'Luton Herald and Post' dated 21st July 2011.
This is not humorous but very stupid and the respective editors should have prevented its transmission. For those who might consider my response extreme, then let me point out that this sick trend is a manifestation of a very dangerous undercurrent given carte blanche by the irresponsible actions of the toxic tobacco control lobby and two governments: the last one, New-Labour and this one, supposedly Conservative, who have given the green light for anything that intimidates or damages smokers to be okay.
This notion that shooting smokers is okay is not new. See for example, this article in Ham & High: 'Hampstead and Highgate Express':
“Smoking party goers shot by air gun sniper"
18 October 2007
SMOKERS at a party discovered their habit really was bad for their health when they stepped outside and were shot at by air rifle snipers. The victims were hosting a party in Kingsgate Road in Kilburn on October 6 but things turned sour just after midnight. Party host Adam Terry, 24, said: "We had the balcony doors open as several of us smoke. "My girlfriend went out on to the balcony for a cigarette, and came back in complaining that she had been hit - she'd felt a sharp pain in her shoulder. I went out to have a smoke, felt a very sharp pain in my head and when I put my hand up there to feel it, found that a small metal air rifle round had punctured the skin and I was bleeding." The housemates called police but before they arrived a third smoker went outside to locate the snipers and was shot in the back. Police arrived on the scene and checked the injuries. They told people not to go back out on the balcony for the rest of the night and to draw the curtains in case the windows were shot at. Mr Terry, who works as a civil servant, said: "We received a follow-up phone call the next day, and a visit from the forensics' team. The police confirmed that it would be difficult to find out who did it, but suggested a leafleting campaign on the road from where the shots were fired - Mazenod Avenue - warning about the dangers of shooting people in the head with air rifles."